Dreamer

Start.

I've had a number of dream occupations throughout my 21 years of life. Here's the list, chronologically speaking.

1. Fire fighter.
Reason: Well who would say no to saving the world in a freaking orange uniform? Not me!
What happened: Fire fighting seems like a tough job for a small person. My heart is big but my figure is stick thin, small. Hopeless. haha

2. Singer.
Reason: I used to want to be like Siti Nurhaliza. Okay don't give me the weird look. I put the word used to. I was like 5 or something at that time plus she was a hit during my childhood days ok. So it's quite common for girls to actually idolize her.
What happened: as I grow up my taste in music diversify and I am no longer a fan of her. heh heh pluss, singing for a living? of course a no. such a funny cita-cita. I'm glad this dream was shortly lived.

3. Gynaecologist. 
Reason: I'm not sure why. Maybe because the word gynaecologist itself. I was a kid, and the word seems pretty weird, exciting and interesting. I looked it up in the dictionary, turns out to be a woman doctor specialist. So I thought maybe that is not such a bad dream job after all.
What happened: My fear of needle is the thing that crushed my fantasy of playing doctor. I can't imagine poking other people with needles, I'd be the first to faint. And so, I don't see myself fit to be a doctor.

4. Cook.
Reason: My mum's such an amazing cook, so is my two older sisters. They are the reason why I wanted to cook yummy food for everyone. I used to play masak-masak by myself. Playing with uncooked rice, imagining it as something else and pretending to cook awesome food. That was so much fun.
What happened: I am such a terrible cook. Plus I have a history of burning the kettle and wok. *facepalm*


5. Interior Designer.
Reason: I used to think interior designing is all about perfect positioning of furniture, wall color that'd match the theme, that sort of things. The feeling is like, the grownup version of the game rumah-rumah that we used to play when we were kids. How much fun is that kan, playing susun-susun furniture see where it fits.
What happened: Nothing happened, I just don't think my parents would approve of such thing. They'd be like.. "What kind of occupation is that dude? It's not even a real job!"

6. Writer.
Reason: Simply because I like writing, regardless the crappiness of my written stuff. I seem to be scoring a lot more on literature subjects compared to science related subjects. So I was a little bit more convinced I can be a good writer. I once tried writing a story, but I only managed to write up to 3 or 4 pages.
What happened: I've always wanted to be a random kind of writer, writing weirdly and stuff but well I lack creative juices so I end up sounding pretty repetitive and boring. plus my parents aren't too fond with the idea of having a daughter who writes for a living. So, reject.

7. Ice Cream Connoisseur
Reason: My mom bought me an ice cream book that is as thick as my Calculus text book. The ice cream looks so tempting and yummy, so I thought why not become an ice cream connoisseur? To come up with your own recipe, and make super delicious ice cream that literally puts a smile on every face of the person who ate my creation. That feeling would be divine.
What happened: I failed at making the basic vanilla ice cream. It always ends up as a failure, instead of ice cream I get egg cream, egg smelling ice cream. icky, I shall not waste another shilling to buy vanilla bean and pay for the electric wasted from the usage of ice cream maker and freezer.

8. Archaeologist. (or anything related to history or old stuff)
Reason: Well history can be pretty boring at times, but I like artifacts and museums that sort of stuff. Travelling from one place to another, finding traces of history seems like a pretty awesome thing to do. (Relic Hunter series is also one of the reason why I like this kinda thing. hehe)
What happened: my sister told me this, "Ha suka la benda-benda lama. Entah-entah ada hantu" heh. but well to be honest that is kinda scary. Nevertheless, I still think this would be one of the most interesting job evaaah.

9. Entrepreneur.
Reason: Bak kata nabi Muhammad saw, berniaga ni 1/10 dari punca rezeki. I like money, I mean who doesn't. When you find something you like, it doesn't feel so much like a job to you. What triggers the so-called 'business senses' in me was Kulkith shoes. I fancy them as much as my friends so I thought, why not sell them? I can wear them, my friends can wear them, everybody wins.
What happened: I currently am doing it as a temporary thing, selling shoes. My friends think it's a big risk, this whole business thing. My dad thinks I shouldn't be doing it because it would distract me from my studies. Well he was right, so I might stop this whole thing for a while. Mom said I can continue doing it a part time job, after I finish with studies.

10. Environmentalist.
Reason: It's like being a superhero, but realistically speaking. You save the environment, you save the world.
What happened: I wish I can do something that could give a big impact to the environment, like create a machine that would release a gas that could neutralize the harmful gas released by cars and factories. Or save the tuna fish and dolphins population from going extinct. Stuff like that. But I am not capable of such thing. Despite my incapability to do all that, I do small things, like forbidding people around me from littering, I tighten the tap when I see it being improperly closed and leaked, and switching off the plug when not using it. These things might look like nothing but well at least I'm doing something right?

There are a lot more, but I can't remember. So yea that's pretty much it. Go through the list again. See there's no Engineer in that list? Seriously speaking, I never wanted to be an engineer. I got the worst grade for Physics in SPM, I actually did better for Biology and Chemistry subjects yet my dad thinks it's a pretty brilliant idea to enrol me into engineering course. And so, that was the story behind how I end up doing that. Fulfilling my duty as a daughter to obey my parents and make them happy.

I've been doing some thinking lately, and I'm considering on continuing my studies after I finish with the current one. I think I wanna do the archaeology thingy. Totally unrelated to engineering.  I'm sure my dad's gonna go ballistic, flipping tables when he hears about this. haha. I have no intentions of telling him anytime soon.

Anyway this has been a long entry.

End.