Liar liar, pants on fire.

Ustaz Dasuki kata pelaku dosa akan sentiasa berasa ketagih untuk melakukan dosa. Tak perlu tengok jauh, kita ambil contoh yang paling kecil, menipu. A lie would leads to another lie which would lead to another lie.

Cara nak menghalang ketagihan? Banyakkan beristighfar.

Something to do everyday;

At the end of everyday before you go to bed or after you do your Isyak prayer, spend a little time to reminisce on all the things you have done on that day. Think of all the bad things you have done and take that little time to ask for His forgiveness. Kadang-kadang benda macam ni nampak kecil dan remeh je pada mata kita, tapi besar pada pandangan Pencipta kita.

Sometimes, small things make the biggest difference.

Always be reminded, however big or small our sin(s) is/are, rahmat Allah tu luas. Selagi mana dia bagi kita bernafas, selagi tu kita diberi peluang untuk bertaubat.

:)

5 Years Time

In five years time I might not know you

In five years time we might not speak

In five years time we might not get along 

In five years time you might just prove me wrong

Doodle Challenge : Day 5

"You have brain in your head. You have feet in your shoes. 

You can steer yourself any direction you choose. " 

- Dr Seuss

Meh.

So Result Day is today. 

After countless refreshing/loading page of student info, at last I knew my results. MEH. It was, not too bad but really bad. bad but not too bad. Disappointed? Hell yeah I am. Who do I blame for this? No one but myself. :(

It is such a sad fact that I'm a sucker for distraction, totally dysfunctional when it comes to handling problems. And distractionsss were so freaking aplenty during last semester, so much time wasted mourning. Sigh. Darling cat went to kitty heaven, super badass midterms, dead boyfriend (eh?) what better timing they all had. nobody saw that coming huh? I should have studied in advance if I knew these things were going to come and chase me in July. I wish I had a time machine to fix everything. Luls, so much wishful thinking, stop that. :|

Oh well, like what John Mayer said, "Bad news never had good timing" Shit happens all the time, it's either now or later. So I try to accept the fact that maybe Allah has decided that last semester was the best timing to test me. Mak always reminds me that all things happen for a reason. So I'm sure You have better plans for me. :)

I've decided that I certainly am not, will not let those things and people drag me down for next sem. Weird enough I actually felt pretty stoked about starting the new sem. 1 day left! Such a rare feeling, to look forward to start classes and meeting people and fyp and stuff. Haha! Well thank you God for the slap on the face, figuratively.

All I can say is ..

Bring in all the shitz man, coz I'm gonna *study and do better this time! \o/

*hopefully this semangat lasts for more than 1 week. teehee.

Only Hope / Dare You To Move

When it feels like my dreams are so far,

Sing to me of the plans that You have for me over again.

---

Everybody's watching you now, everybody waits for you now.

What happens next?

Fries in Cream

Do what makes you H-A-P-P-Y

never turn back, back, back

never come back, back, back

Doodle Challenge : Day Four

A clown name Oolong.

In Fluffyland there was a clown name Oolong. His favourite number is 2. He parts his hair into two, going bald in the middle. Mr Oolong is always seen holding two irregular-shaped balloon, while strolling through Oodly Dot Park.

Mr Oolong has a girlfriend, Darjeeling. She's so shy, no one has ever seen her face. What everyone knew about Darjeeling is that she has long purple hair and very long finger nails and she's always upside down.

Such an odd couple those two.

Javachip & Americano.

We've known each other for a long time, but I never knew your coffee preference. I texted you, asking about that. Your reply was, "Bout the kopi, we think about it nanti."

As I ponder upon the meaning of your text, I quickly went to the nearest coffee shop in Taipan. So many varieties up on the shelf. Decaf, flavored, dark & distinctive, rich & creamy. Tough choice, I end up choosing Mocha Java and prayed to God you'd like it.

---

I've never been to LCCT before, driving on my own would be sorta impossible plus my mum wouldn't let me. I asked my sister to take me there. She drove my dad's car, at a speed of 120km/h but still, I felt like the car is moving oh so slow. If only I could make the car go any faster, I would. Along the way, I made up conversations in my head to occupy myself. Thinking of questions to ask, stories to tell.

Got there by 5.30pm. I was late. You told me to wait in front of the coffee shop. So that was what you meant, we'd be having a cuppa coffee. I felt silly for being so stubborn, should've waited, I could have bought you your favourite coffee instead.

Ordered our drinks and then find ourselves a table. Q&A session. Awkward. You kept stirring your coffee. Cakap sikit, jawab sikit. You were serious, no smile no nothing. The tense, reminds me of being in a principal's office. Soon enough I ran out of questions. Sucked the hell out of my frap. More awkward silence. You came to the rescue when you started talking about your backpacking trips. Kapadokya, Beijing, Alexandria. They did sound like so much fun, you seemed so happy talking about it, I enjoyed listening to your stories.

Half an hour.

Finally managed to put a smile on that face. Molek sikit. haha. But too bad, it was short-lived as I had to go back to Subang already, so that would mean goodbye. I wished we had all the time in the world, but we don't.

Nevertheless it was the best half an hour of my life, catching up with you. At the end of the day, our brief talk inspired me to study harder, get good results for my own sake. I need that, a boost. So thank you :)

In all, yesterday certainly has left quite an impression on me.

---

Dark and strong. That's how you like your coffee. I'll keep it in mind for next time, if any.
So, see you again, maybe?

Andy

Meet me on the surface of Jupiter
We don't need no reason, just make it up
Bring your pen and paper and some time to think
Don't you leave a page 'til your out of ink

Hey Monday.

Wanting to do so much, but end up doing nothing. Does this sound familiar to you? Happens all the time with me.

1. Ice cream // No vanilla beans today.
2. Plushie // Still no confirmed design.
3. Doodle // Lost my pencil and paper.

I'll be productive soon.
Wait for me, Monday.

Boat & Bird

But you can skyrocket away from me
And never come back if you find another galaxy
Far from here with more room to fly
Just leave me your stardust to remember you by

Lesson Number Twenty Two

My definition of happiness is ..

Eating rainbow Paddlepop icecream on a rainy day
Randomly dancing to this one particular song in FOS store
Drinking a cup of lychee rose flavored tea
Sitting on the floor, at a corner of a bookstore reading a good book

It is these little things (and some other things) in life that makes me happy.

To everyone else who is still searching for happiness, take it from Francois Lelord and me;
Lesson 22- Find that little things that keeps your heart feeling content, and just do it.

Brains win hearts too.

Frankly saying you are the oddest person I've ever known in my entire life.

Don't get me wrong. You are odd but in a good way. You're like a walking book or as modern people would put it, you're like Google or Wikipedia on-the-go.

I always wonder, how does one put econs, philosophy, food and music in one conversation. Well, I don't know. You're the first and most probably the only one that can do that. The things that you say never fail to amaze me.

No kidding.

That shows that you don't have to be a sweet talker to win people's heart.

All those talk about philosophy actually made me consider on taking philosophy for my elective subject. Funny because my brain doesn't exactly work like yours. Good thing I did not take that subject, or else I'd flunk. haha.

Anyway I always think you're the smartest person I've ever known. Still thinks so.

I don't think I've ever dedicated a whole entry for anyone else but you. I mean, minus stories about family, close to none. 4 years ago, I wrote about you. Now, I'm doing it again.

I'm sorry it took me 2 years to be telling you all this. That I never hated you, nor did I ever regret knowing you. I'm sorry I made you feel the other way round.

People grow up. Sometimes they stay the same. Sometimes they change for the worst. Sometimes they change for the better. I've learnt from my mistakes. May we both find morgenstern of our own someday. insyaAllah. :)

Fin.

Alas, I am free from the clutch of azignmentz! Freeeeedom smell so sweet. Need to grab some Freedom Fries while I'm at it. Fiu~

I'm Going To Stop Pretending That I Didn't Break Your Heart

And I'm a little too late, by three or four years.

Do you mind?

I don't think I can do the 1 day 1 doodle challenge. Apparently I do not have time to do that :/ But no worries, I will still do doodles and post them here whenever I have the time.

Regardless my final exams are done, I still have a pile of assignment to pass up -_-" Steel assignment is still on hold. To submit tomorrow. Say waaaaht?

Progress?

feeling-feeling engineer sikit. heh

Beams, columns, supports done. Andd the last time I checked, I only managed to get as far as putting the slabs on the structure. Plenty more stuff to do, like putting on loads and stuff but I don't know how to do it. Which made this whole thing so frustrating.

I wonder how people managed to do megastructures like KLCC or something of that sort, using that software. So much work to doooo waah do wa doo. So much patience, they have. If I were them, my laptop would end up with a big whole on the screen. Because I lack patience, so I just might as well punch it, "kasi bolosss sama dia!" bak kata Zizan dalam gameshow Bolos.

I'm beginning to wonder if it is going to be a good idea, to take 'learning softwares' for my elective subject. I mean I do like it, but since I'm quite a slow learner, this subject might be kinda a pain in the bum.

Hah. Something to consider before naik sem nanti.

Skeleton Song

but skeleton you are my friend, and i could never bring your life to an end. yes skeleton, you are, you are my friend. and i will be there for you until the end.

Doodle Challenge : Day Three

She told me her name is Ella

I was on my way to Fluffyland when I saw this quirky flower. She introduced herself, she told me her name is Ella. For a flower, she had the curliest hair, I've ever seen. So I took her home and put her in a vase.

Doodle Challenge : Day Two

where the tame and odd things are

It was once known as Oddland. but the creatures there, as odd as they are, they weren't too fond of the name. Thus they changed it to Fluffyland. Regardless the name, not everything is fluffy there. 

Doodle Challenge : Day One

I dared myself to take the doodle challenge. One doodle per day, and post it over here.
So here's a doodle for today :D

 Hipster with a broken Hip

You've got growing up to do.

"A handbag is like a closet door to Narnia or to simply put it like a Doraemon's pocket. Looks like nothing on the outside but so many things to discover in the inside. "
-A wise saying from the not so wise dinosaur, A. Chan.

I used to think it's quite impractical to be walking around with a handbag. Yea lah. Too many zips, too many small compartments, too much fuss especially when you are trying to find that one thing you needed most. You can easily lose yourself or maybe find a bunny innit. So complicated. Plus, handbag kepit bawah ketiak. Minus points for that! Thus when everyone wears a handbag, I opt for a backpack. More convenient I can say.

I wear a backpack everywhere I go, no matter what the occasion. To the class, hang out with friends, going to the mall, etc etc. I feel comfortable that way and it has been like that for quite some time until.. now. Sekarang berasa pelik dan aneh dan pelik bila pakai backpack. Tengok member semua pun so womanly, made me feel ridiculous and so childlike. I feel like I have to conform to the society's expectation, that in order to look like an adult, one has to own a decent handbag.

Oh man. Can I just say I'm getting girly-er by day. So weirddd but senang cerita. Ni baru mukadimah pasal handbag, belum lagi pasal benda lain :s Actually to think that I actually wrote a whole essay on handbag is just .. wow.


seriously what is happening to me? :O

It's time for a holiholiholiday!

I'm a tough soldier, and I'm coming home soon.

The war between pen and paper, human brain versus questions are finally over. I am officially done with my exams. Quite nervous of the outcomes truthfully. I think I did quite badly but I hope not too bad that it'd spoil my results.

"Bismillahi tawakkal tu 'alallah. Wa lahaulawala quwwataillah billah hil'aliyyil 'azim"

Dah berusaha, jadi tawakkal je lah, dan doa sebanyak yang mungkin. Anyway, now that the examss are done, I now have time for myself. To list out some of the things that I might do during the 2weeks break;

1. Gain weight! Like seriously need to do this. Last time I checked I was 31kg. Aim for cuti ni, to weigh 35kg minimum and maximum. om nom nom spree it is! ^w^
2. Have to generate ideas for business to make it work work work, successfully. Advertisement? Rebranding? To really think of it, rasa macam lebih beria berniaga daripada ber-engineer. Har har, memang mintak kena libas dengan Abah.
3. Do sketches of plushie and make them jump out of paper. If rajin, sew these stuff. Hm, I remember owing Nana a plushie. :O
4. Go out more often! Go to interesting places, do interesting things, meet interesting people. So much to explore, if Mak let me. hewhew. But I think I'll end up spending time picking up kids from school, attending lectures dekat masjid.
5. Be more willing, more rajin to attend kelas ilmu dekat masjid. Jangan tunggu hati hitam, keras macam batu.
6. Ngorat people. eh? haha.

Just kidding. I think 5 things are already much stuff to keep me occupied during the holiday. Plus it's a short one, not much time to do stuff pun. Baru nak unpack, tengok-tengok dah in second week of holiday. I think it's gonna turn out that way. Haha

Oh well, I guess this is it for now. Planning planss. Much fun. now is time for bed, no time to waste after spending 2 weeks struggling in war. Every minute is preciouss *talks like a gollum in Lord of The Ring* ignore that bit.

So good night folks, this little soldier is going to zzz.

Bye!

Death is, inevitable.

To our dearest darling Foxy kitty,

I'm so sorry I did not spare more time to give you tummy rubs or pet your head. We love you a lot regardless how you are always biting our legs and arms to wake us up, regardless how you are always sitting on the newspaper while we were trying to read it. We loved you no matter what.

Please know that we will always remember you. Send our regards to Ciki, Tam, Oren and the anon bibis. Tell them we miss them every single day. We will not forget to send imaginary salmons to all of you kitties everyday.

Much love,
From Abah, Mak, Moira, Adlina, Alya, Aqilah, Afiqah, Izzat, Ariff, Faizul and Pedram.

Iron fist!

Seriously I feel like laughing at myself, and giving me a big punch on the ribs right now. The irony of it. Haha.

HAHA.

Pop a neuron.

I've always been a lazy thinker, I hate thinking. So many organs involved when you're thinking. The heart and the brain, it works simultaneously when you think, which later on leads to actions done by your hands legs eyes ears kidney, well everything lah. So yea basically to sum it all up, thinking exhausts me. Even to think of writing this makes me.. Malas cakap lah. Yes, you can say that I have a lazy brain. I don't mind a bit.

Lately that is all that I've been doing. Thinking. It's a weird thing how a lazy brain can do wonders, like think of the unthinkable. Good side of it, "congratulations! you have quite an imagination!" Down side of it, you'd be thinking of all sorts of things. You'll end up having to do the math, calculating all the possibilities for the scenario which you have in your head to happen in real life. Like imagining a boogeyman under your bed. You'd be scared shitless to even let your hands and legs hanging outside the bed compound.

So then, now tell me how does one feel safe from her own thoughts? I guess the only thing you can do is stop thinking.

Dream within a dream.

5.38am. 

I'm still awake. 

I have been spending all night long, wasting my time thinking about business while listening to Soko - Norah Jones - Elvis Presley - The Like - Oren Lavie. A good work of art must be able to keep you awake, and make you sleepy at the same time. 

And now, my brain finally tells me to shut up and sleep.

I'm going to bed. Now.

Death certainly has a way of knocking you conscious again.

Received news of death, of a friend who once studied in the same school as I was during my Form1-Form3 years. She was a 5th year medic student. On her way back to Uni in Russia, she was involved in an accident, among other few female friends. She didn't survive the tragedy, she died on the spot.

To hear such news is just beyond shocking.

.

A reminder to self, that life is short. We never know when's our time. Death doesn't wait. Our deadline could be today, could be tomorrow. Let us all work hard from now on, to achieve Jannah.

.

My condolences to her family and friends.

May Allah grant her eternal peace, and may her soul be placed among the pious.
Inalillahiwainalillahirajiun.
Al-Fatihah.

How fickle my heart and how woozy my eyes

So many sleep, so many naps lately. But even with so many of all that, yet I still feel tired. My body feels weak, my heart still panting, out of breathe from all the endless chasing game for the past few weeks. Maybe all this thinking about tales of the past, and the stories of future are the culprit behind my restlessness.

So many things to think, so many stuff to do.

I'm just so tired physically and emotionally. When will I ever get some peace of mind.

The dinosaur's cocoon.

I roar laughter, tears and anger in the form of words.

Lately I have been riding on an emotion roller coaster, causing me to roar a lot at the wrong place. Too much something is never good. I know some does feel uncomfortable by the things I said.

So it is now time to let it all out, here.

This will be a place for stories told by a fluffy hearted dinosaur.
This will be my safe house.